Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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