i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize