Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Randomize
