I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Randomize
