your thong is hanging out like whoa
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
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