my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
did i walk over a car last night?
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
