i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
The beer is more important than you right now.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
My bed smells like the plague
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize