omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
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