i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
