i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
