Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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