So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
