the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize