"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
