you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
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