wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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