i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Randomize
