Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
