you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
