i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Banned from zoo.
Again?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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