Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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