But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
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