As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I just found puke in my bra..
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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