we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize