Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
