You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize