I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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