Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
