If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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