somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I think I won the penis lottery.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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