Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
