I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize