My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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