My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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