goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
last night I used snow as a chaser
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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