Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
