Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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