i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
