And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
you win again, gameday.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
