so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
