and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
