so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
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