watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
is that a dick in a sweater?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
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