If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
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