my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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