tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
