Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
