my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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