This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize