If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
